Friday, June 1, 2018

The Elephant in the Room - and the Spiritual Communal Pinnacle

I started the discussion April 13, 2018 about The Elephant in the Room - Adolescents can be wedges!  During these past five writings we utilized 5 Scientifically Proven Ways to Raise Happier Kids as an effective tool to start the conversation on how children can cause challenges in the communication and overall flow of the primary relationship - the two partners.  I will term two people as partners which is inclusive of married couples, domestic partners, and any union which is defined as a partnership as the people define it (This is an open definition that morphs and changes as poly-fluidity, polyamorous can be ...

a part of this conversation).  This becomes more complex as one, or two, parties might endorse a covariant into the relationship).  As previously stated, I have been focusing on couples counseling and marital support in the Los Angeles area for the past decade.  I also stated that I absolutely love working with this population due to the intrinsically intangible gratifying feeling. Without disclosing, I just had a recent event with a couple that still resonates residue of bliss.  It was not about the couple changing or moving in a positive direction. It was about hearing that they had made a decision based on love. Moreover, their decision was based on a union based on their Knowing Themselves.  Thomas Parham’s, Ph.D., Vice Chancellor, U.C. Irvine, extensive work gives great detail about the African Worldview and knowing One’s Self as reaching what I would term the Spiritual Communal Pinnacle.  

So, receiving a call from this couple was Blove (bliss and love).  They unknowingly had sprinkles of the Spiritual Communal Pinnacle.  I have no power or knowledge of if it will rain or if this rain will be a symbolic seasoning of the relationship.  But the couple created blove and they felt sprinkles. So, they experienced. They felt fresh. So, for me? How can I put a price tag on knowing that experience?  Thus, couples counseling is unexplainably rewarding as I hear intimate stories of the Spiritual Communal Pinnacle experience.

Although this blove is rewarding there is this Elephant that I have been addressing.  Children. Longitudinal evidenced based data was previously discussed about the hardest years of marriage being the childbearing years.  Further discussion revealed that happiness and the ease of marriage might dissolve in a young marriage and rekindled in the later stages of a  marriage. So, if it made no sense as to why I was focusing on these 5 points of making your kids happy it might now become connected. If we work at improving, or managing, this difficult period of child-rearing (the elephant in the room and the cock-blockers) we can reach the golden years with less intrusion and perhaps without marital crashes.  

Therefore, the is meaning and reasons for going to work; locking up your smartphone during child intimacy; sending the kids to bed early; singing to your kids; and running around with them (symbolically meaning literally running to taking them to their first concert, volunteering at homeless shelters, political rallies to going to Home Depot).  So, the University of Cambridge jokingly, states to sweat with your kids (meaning to jog and hike and get a bit smelly). As a clinical depth psychology with an understanding of Jungian ideology I would go deeper. I would say SWEAT WITH YOUR KIDS.
Children are gritty and grimy and tiring from a workout.  Children are a physical exhaustion in which you will need to shower.  They are psychically smelly and the sweat can come from your forehead into your eyes and the sweat stings.  And the people around you be off put by the stench. But this only means you are working and alive. It also means that antioxidants are being released.  It also means you are staying youthful. It also means that you are keeping your symbolic muscles and joints alive. You are nurturing your seeds. Thus, if you you are making your children happy your relationship will be happy.  And if your pothagrim theoreming the situation; then, making children happy, equals making relationships happy, which then equals reaching a realm of the Spiritual Connected Pinnacle.       

Photo by Chris Rhoads on Unsplash

Photo by Levi Jones on Unsplash

Photo by Robert Murray on Unsplash

Reference sites of interest of regarding Relationships:

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