Monday, April 9, 2018

Can we make healthy jokes? About Marriage?

Fear Fright Horror Frightened Action Figur
I just read Pause for Reflection The secret of a successful marriage in the long haul and honestly became nervous.  This nervousness was because I was at a coffee shop writing a blog and shifted abruptly to post this article because I realized that I blurted out an embarrassingly high-volumed-shocked-beyond-belief laugh which caused everyone to turn in my direction. With the tension of the current political and social climate life is just stressful.  It is affecting families and even marriages and couples. Does a marriage therapist in Los Angeles avoid topics that are political despite these very issues being a strong undercurrent that can drift you toward a waterfall?  Or does a therapist forge into topics which are potentially too raw for discussion despite being a topic if importance? Can a joke become a healthy way to break into conversation to ease the tension? In the above mentioned article the joke is so telling.  During the vaudeville era jokes of unease were accepted in a different way than as they are today.  Marriage was definitely presented differently in the golden era of television.  In telling joke you have themes of gun control, signs of spousal abuse, domestic violence, animal abuse and potential signs of child abuse.  What else do you see? In case you are too preoccupied to click on the above link highlights are: "The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret" - Henny Youngman.  The world record for shortest marriage is 6 hours (unsourced).

The Joke which caused me to lose it in public:  

Once upon a time a couple celebrated their 25th marriage anniversary, not having had a single conflict. Asked about their secret, the husband said: "Well, on our honeymoon we went riding. My wife's horse was a crazy one. He jumped, making her topple. She patted his back and said, "This is your first time."

After it happened again, she calmly said, "This is your second time". When the horse dropped her a third time, she took a gun from her purse and shot the horse. I shouted, "Why did you do that! Are you crazy?" She gave a silent look and calmly said: "This is your first time."

Read more about Dr. Strayhorn's practice and philosophy...

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